Meanies in the Pews

A few years ago I heard Tony Campolo tell an audience of mostly lay people "You're mean" And they laughed! In Tony's own way he had humorously hit upon a nasty truth of the church. I laughed, too...at their laughter. What had they missed about his rather humorous critique? Did they think he wasn't talking about them? The not so funny part of it was that at the time I was embroiled in a church controversy that although not about me or initiated by me, I was the one bearing the brunt of the "fix it" cries. I felt powerless to stop the nastiness and mean spirited comments that were flying around meetings, on the phone and in the parking lot. Telling them to stop, preaching about love and acceptance from the pulpit, refusing to be part of meetings where they were so harsh with one another, didn't stop the meanness. And based on Campolo's statement I wasn't the first pastor to witness this phenomenon.

So here's my question. Where do Christians learn to be mean? We certainly don't have to look too far to see the meanness of some in the right wing who make headlines on a regular basis. Is this where they learn that it is ok? Probably not. The reason I say that is because most of the 'nasty' ones I have encountered are life long Christians. They grew up in the church, learned the Bible stories, took communion and served on boards. And that is perhaps where the learning of unChristian behavior really starts to take form - the church meeting.

And here's the bigger more personal question...how do we as pastor's perpetuate the lack of civility in the church? More on this as we go along....